Here are the core principles of parenting toward the Kingdom.
The word "asceticism" often sounds harsh, but it simply means training or discipline . In a world of instant gratification, Orthodox parenting encourages small, loving denials. This doesn't mean harsh deprivation, but teaching a child to say “no” to a third cookie, “later” to a screen, or “thank you” for a simple gift. These tiny acts build nepsis (watchfulness)—the ability to choose the good over the easy. Here are the core principles of parenting toward the Kingdom
Ultimately, the goal is not a “good kid” who obeys out of fear. The goal is an adult who is free —free from the slavery of passions like vanity, envy, and gluttony. This freedom is the ability to love God and neighbor spontaneously, without internal compulsion. As the child grows, the parent’s authority should fade, replaced by the child’s own internal compass guided by the Holy Spirit. This doesn't mean harsh deprivation, but teaching a
Raising Saints: An Introduction to Orthodox Christian Principles of Childrearing The goal is an adult who is free
We get up. We go to Confession. We ask our child’s forgiveness. And together, parent and child, we walk toward the Kingdom—not as perfect people, but as forgiven sinners holding hands on the way to the Father’s house.
“Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not depart from it.” — Proverbs 22:6 (Interpreted in the Orthodox tradition as the way of humility, love, and ascetic struggle).