“Jas,” I said, “I don’t want organic yoghurt. I want a moment . A cinematic, rain-drizzled, eyebrow-touch moment.”
We assembled in the Shed of Solitude (it’s just a garden shed with fairy lights and an old trampoline mat). Jas immediately said, “Georgia, you can’t force a perfect snog. It has to happen organically, like a yoghurt.”
So I texted the Ace Gang.
— Georgia xxx P.S. Angus the cat just walked over my notebook and sat on the “lip balm” section. That’s a sign. Probably.
Here’s a short piece written in the spirit of Angus, Thongs and Perfect Snogging (2008), channeling the voice of Georgia Nicolson—diary entries, dramatic teen angst, and all—plus a nod to “mtrjm” (mate, ready, join) as a call to assemble the Ace Gang. Operation Perfect Snog (MTRJM Edition) --- shahd fylm Angus Thongs And Perfect Snogging 2008 mtrjm
Status: Dying of humiliation. Again.
Rosie suggested practicing on a sausage roll. Ellen suggested hypnotism. I suggested they were all useless. “Jas,” I said, “I don’t want organic yoghurt
It all started because I, Georgia Nicolson (14, fabulous nose, tragic personality) decided I needed to perfect The Snog. Not just any snog—the Perfect Snog . The kind where time stops and your knees actually turn to mashed potato. The kind Robbie the Sex God probably gives out like party favors.
I’ve filled three pages of my notebook: Jas immediately said, “Georgia, you can’t force a